Stephen Colbert has met his match. Literally.
On Friday, the "Colbert Report" host was introduced to his wax figure, his "man crayon," if you will, at Madame Tussauds in D.C. To show his appreciation, he complimented it, cuddled it and kissed it. "Can I lick me?" he asked. (Answer: no). "Too late!" he squealed, wagging his tongue at the other Colbert's wax face. The comedian talked about wax Stephen's importance to him, calling it "the greatest American figurine since the Ken doll" and adding that it would come in handy the next time he was summoned to jury duty. "Ladies and gentleman, there comes a time in every great man's life where he must be cast in wax, if only to remove unwanted body hair," Colbert announced.
He also noted which Washingtonians should join him in being cast in wax. "John Boehner, he's always got a waxy quality to him and it looks like the outside of a gourd most of the time," Colbert said. "Nancy Pelosi, she's a historical figure, do you guys have Nancy Pelosi? That's kind of sexist don't you think -- let's get Nancy Pelosi," he added.
The Comedy Central character also gave reporters a glimpse of what the process of making wax Stephen was like. He was posing in his New York City office when the Obamacare decision was being handed down. "I'm in the middle of being measured for this and I cannot move an inch and I actually had to hold my eyebrow like that and they come in and they say, 'Obamacare's been overturned,' because that is what CNN first reported," Colbert recalled. "For the next half hour I had to sit there while people came at me and read the news to me, so I knew what to say on the show that night."